Karen's Story
After Lily "broke up" with me.... (Can you call it a break up after only few dates?...) I went online to find the next girl that will potentially "break" my heart again... (or may be just cracked it a bit like Lily.....). I had been messaging few girls while I was seen Lily... One of them was Karen, 30-years old tall blond from the US. I usually don't go for older girls due to the fact that I still don't feel like an adult.... But she seemed nice, feminine which is usually my type, and had a nice and honest smile.... We met in the same cafe where I met Lily (and one more after her) and I ordered my usual earl grey tea with milk, she copied my order... She told me that she recently quit her big fancy job in a Pharmaceutical company back in the States. She even mentioned that she had a PhD... but she was now taking some time off... I could guess by her nervousness that she was not used to meet people online, and even less used to meet women... I could also see that see was very scared and probably never been on a date with a girl before... she had that look on her eyes of doing something wrong.... and even if she was very very far away from home, I could see how she was concern of what other people might think of us... I wanted to scream at her: GIRL, THIS IS BRIGHTON! It's alright.... Half of the population is gay, and the other half doesn't care...
I also noticed that she was wearing an engagement ring.... and when we talked about traveling and trips she said that the furthest she has ever been from home was the Seychelles (and the UK now), to what I replied: - Yes, that's the kind of place you will go on your honey moon. Just to see her reaction and get more information about that ring... and she nodded and looked down confirming my suspicions that she was a runaway bride looking for an adventure...
I assumed that she was on her Eat · Pray · Love trip and I didn't want to be her Italian lover or even less her Javier Bardem adventure... I wanted to tell her that it was OK for her to be gay and come out of the closet, if that is what this was all about, but that I was not going to be anyone's lesbian experiment. I was (still am) looking for a full time girlfriend... and despite of the fact that she was very nice and had a pretty smile, I think that I prefer an out-of-the-closet girl who knows what she wants and also, is planning to live in this country for at least a while... I also thought that she was very brave, giving up her life in the US, her fancy job and her husband (?)... She had courage and she was living on the present, that was good, but I wasn't ready to be the adventure that she was looking for... so we finished our tea and said goodbye... I didn't message her back, I wanted to.... but as friends... I am very busy in my everyday life even for massaging my already existing friends, so I had not much time for a new one... so... yeah... I never contacted her again... which makes me feel bad...
She sent me a happy-new-year's eve message, that I really wanted to answer, but I was overseas and I didn't want to get a ridiculous overcharge for a text message... so I didn't reply.... I really hope that she finds what's she is looking for, but I was not ready to be the experimental lesbian love affair that she was hoping to find that would save her from the boredom of her everyday life as a Pharmacist in her little home town somewhere in the East Coast of the States… being someone’s else exotic adventure was not my plan… Are we all looking for an adventure to save us from the boredom of our everyday life?
After Lily "broke up" with me.... (Can you call it a break up after only few dates?...) I went online to find the next girl that will potentially "break" my heart again... (or may be just cracked it a bit like Lily.....). I had been messaging few girls while I was seen Lily... One of them was Karen, 30-years old tall blond from the US. I usually don't go for older girls due to the fact that I still don't feel like an adult.... But she seemed nice, feminine which is usually my type, and had a nice and honest smile.... We met in the same cafe where I met Lily (and one more after her) and I ordered my usual earl grey tea with milk, she copied my order... She told me that she recently quit her big fancy job in a Pharmaceutical company back in the States. She even mentioned that she had a PhD... but she was now taking some time off... I could guess by her nervousness that she was not used to meet people online, and even less used to meet women... I could also see that see was very scared and probably never been on a date with a girl before... she had that look on her eyes of doing something wrong.... and even if she was very very far away from home, I could see how she was concern of what other people might think of us... I wanted to scream at her: GIRL, THIS IS BRIGHTON! It's alright.... Half of the population is gay, and the other half doesn't care...
I also noticed that she was wearing an engagement ring.... and when we talked about traveling and trips she said that the furthest she has ever been from home was the Seychelles (and the UK now), to what I replied: - Yes, that's the kind of place you will go on your honey moon. Just to see her reaction and get more information about that ring... and she nodded and looked down confirming my suspicions that she was a runaway bride looking for an adventure...
I assumed that she was on her Eat · Pray · Love trip and I didn't want to be her Italian lover or even less her Javier Bardem adventure... I wanted to tell her that it was OK for her to be gay and come out of the closet, if that is what this was all about, but that I was not going to be anyone's lesbian experiment. I was (still am) looking for a full time girlfriend... and despite of the fact that she was very nice and had a pretty smile, I think that I prefer an out-of-the-closet girl who knows what she wants and also, is planning to live in this country for at least a while... I also thought that she was very brave, giving up her life in the US, her fancy job and her husband (?)... She had courage and she was living on the present, that was good, but I wasn't ready to be the adventure that she was looking for... so we finished our tea and said goodbye... I didn't message her back, I wanted to.... but as friends... I am very busy in my everyday life even for massaging my already existing friends, so I had not much time for a new one... so... yeah... I never contacted her again... which makes me feel bad...
She sent me a happy-new-year's eve message, that I really wanted to answer, but I was overseas and I didn't want to get a ridiculous overcharge for a text message... so I didn't reply.... I really hope that she finds what's she is looking for, but I was not ready to be the experimental lesbian love affair that she was hoping to find that would save her from the boredom of her everyday life as a Pharmacist in her little home town somewhere in the East Coast of the States… being someone’s else exotic adventure was not my plan… Are we all looking for an adventure to save us from the boredom of our everyday life?
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